Des choses mâle

  

TABAROCKRISSFUCKMARDEWOW!! 

MÂLE!!!

(Sa vient d'un post FB de Contrat d'gars!!)

1. une tabarnak de CATAPULTE !!!! pcq ça symbolise en osti l'éjaculation mais, qu'en plus, ça démolie des châteaux forts calisse!!!!
2. une grosse criss de hache avec du poil!!! cé mâle ça!!!!
3. un monster truck en magma de bite!!!!!!!!crisseciboire fucknac
4. UNE MOISSONNEUSE BATTEUSE ATTACHÉE A UN TAUREAU AVEC UNE CHAIN SAW DANS L'CUL, CÂLISS
5. TABARNAK le penis en plastique dma blonde tu devrais i voir le chaft !! depuis kiai dans famille crisse qu'a fait du bon manger!!
6.  UN DILDO FUCKING BOURRÉ D'PIQUE AVEC UN LANCE-FLAMME INTÉGRER.
7.  t male quan tu te brosse les dent aek une brosse a barbecu pi dl'huile a moteur, que tu te passe du barbelé dentaire pi que tu te coupe la barbe a chainsaw!
8. HIN BAZOOKA QUI PITCH DES CHAINSAW EN FEU TABARNAKRISS!!!!!!!!
9.  DEs OUtil C pas MAle MOé Jrentre les clou avec mes poings pis jsoude le métal avec mon haleine pis jcoupe toute avec mes DENT TABARNAFUCkcUL!
10. Le SHAMWOW! C'est pas un outil, mais TABARNAK QUE ÇA ABSORBE!
11. un couteau suisse pcq tu peu tuer un bébé lappin de 50 facon diferente
12. UN CRISS DE GROS MAMOUTH MONTÉ SUR DES CHENILLES, AVAEC UN LANCE ROQUETTE DANS L'CUL, DES CHAINSAW SUR LES CÔTÉ PI UN CHAINGUN EN AVANT! AH OUAIS, PI UNE OSTI DE PAIRS DE GOSSES! ÇA C'EST MÂLE EN TABARNACRISS! PI UNE FOIS SUL MAMOUTH, T'ÉGORGE DES CHÈVRES AVEC TES DENTS! OUAIS ÇA C'EST HOT!
13.  S TUNE FUCKING GUITAR ELECTRIQUE QUI CRACHE DU FEUX COMME SA TU PEUT FAIRE DES OSTI D RIFF DLA MORT PI TU PEUT T BATTRE CONTRE ARNOLD CHWEFENEWIOUBGER(sais pas comment sa s ecri) QUAND YÉ EN TERMINATOR SA C MALE EN CIBOIRNAFUCKUL
14. Une chainsaw-suisse ostie!!! D'un côté, une chainsaw à 3 lames. De l'autre côté, des pinces de désincarcération, un lance-flammes et un distributeur de films pornos.
15.  l'outil le plus mâle c'est ton bouton Caplocks
16. UN GUN A CLOU MAIS QUI TIRE DES TIGRE SUR DES BARILS DE TNT
17. TA TÊTE OSTIE! TU PEUX CLOUER AVEC TON FRONT! PIS ARRACHER LES CLOUS AVEC TES DENTS!
18. S'tun gay TABARNAK pcque devant un gay ta jamais l'air fif coliss mais si ta lair fif devant un gay bin la té gay en tbrnk.....
19. Une chainsaw-suisse ostie!!! D'un côté, une chainsaw à 3 lames. De l'autre côté, des pinces de désincarcération, un lance-flammes et un distributeur de films pornos.
20. FOURRER UN AUTOBUS !calisser la graine dans le tuyau d'exhaust pi rester prit dedans parce que té un vrai male
21. La plupart des douche bag qui écrive en lettre majuscule icit pis qui passe pour des tit kid de 12 ans...
22.  Ouais des Penis de 25 pouces et PLus..
23. une femme parce qu'elle fait un bon rack a pénis
24.  Les 5 filles qui sont dans mon lit pis qui attendent que j'aille me coucher dans 15 minutes.
25. UN GUN PI TU CRIE ASSEZ FORT COMME CA TU PEUT MENACER LE TRUC QUE TU RÉPARE OU CONSTRUIT POUR QUI SE FASSE TOUT SEUL PARCE QUE YA PEUR CALISS
26. DES CISEAUX CRAYOLA
27. Cul-poêleabois-fuck-cul-pénis!
28. Un sabre faite en magma pis la poignée stun dragon faite en loup qui accouche de grizzly
29.  l'outil le plus male est la femme, car elle peut crisser un homme a terre quand elle le veut
30. une chainsaw!!! ca déviarge, ca sent l'gaz pis ca fait du bruit!!
31. Ou un OSTI de tondeuse/truck aek des FLAMES pis un radio qui joue du RAMMSTEIN aek une CHAINSAW au lieu des lames FUCKARNACRISS

Autres sources de virilité!....


SALVIDRIM:  UN TRUCK DE FEU QUI ROULE SUR DES TIRES EN DÉMONS AVEC DEUX CANONS QUI TIRENT DES LOUPSANCESTRAUX QUI CRACHENT DES SUPERNOVAS
Milie: Owii mon gros cochon 
Jess : Des choses male

Pamela : des torses poilu

Nickie: gros caca

Félix : Ostie que j'aime sa boire dla gazosine !!!! gozoline*

Kapoui : Aggrr je suis viril

Mathieu : Des beaux mollets rempli de poil pubien bien épais et bien et bien frisé longueur minimale de 8 cm bien évidemmen 

Marie-Christ : tracteur faite en feu qui mange des grizzli enceintes de requins qui pleure du sang dans un lac de magma.

Kristel:  sex ;;

Léonie : .. viril grrrr

BB : Vas dans ta cuisine femme! *burp*

Games, money, sex, nudity, awesome sign.

What the hell?


Games have long used corporate and business brands to gain a few extra advertising dollars to help developers go from “super mega mighty rich” to “super mega colossal mighty rich.”  xD
No one, however, really would've noticed it or even seen it since the game is harder than a diamond with a Viagra boner.    


GTA, however, has always been a lightning rod for whining and complaining since the open sandbox nature of the game lets players do everything from throw grenades into a busy intersection or force-feed the business end of a rocket launcher into the "business end" of an old lady’s cat.  
Ahhh, naked Boobies, where would America be without you? Under a communist zombie Nazi-loving dictator, that’s where!


If kids are subjected to scenes of graphic sex or nudity, they’ll become mutant, DNA-slinging horndogs with an appetite for mindless intercourse and unfiltered cigarettes.



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  / /  / // //7/ _/  /_  _//// // /,' _/
 / /_ / //  ,'/ _/    / / / ` // /_\ `. 
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| |  | || |/ /| |_     | |  | L| || |\_"-. 
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/___\/_\/_\\_|/____\   /_\  /_\/_\/_\/___/ 
                                           


LLLLLLLLLLL             IIIIIIIIIIKKKKKKKKK    KKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
L:::::::::L             I::::::::IK:::::::K    K:::::KE::::::::::::::::::::E
L:::::::::L             I::::::::IK:::::::K    K:::::KE::::::::::::::::::::E
LL:::::::LL             II::::::IIK:::::::K   K::::::KEE::::::EEEEEEEEE::::E
  L:::::L                 I::::I  KK::::::K  K:::::KKK  E:::::E       EEEEEE
  L:::::L                 I::::I    K:::::K K:::::K     E:::::E             
  L:::::L                 I::::I    K::::::K:::::K      E::::::EEEEEEEEEE   
  L:::::L                 I::::I    K:::::::::::K       E:::::::::::::::E   
  L:::::L                 I::::I    K:::::::::::K       E:::::::::::::::E   
  L:::::L                 I::::I    K::::::K:::::K      E::::::EEEEEEEEEE   
  L:::::L                 I::::I    K:::::K K:::::K     E:::::E             
  L:::::L         LLLLLL  I::::I  KK::::::K  K:::::KKK  E:::::E       EEEEEE
LL:::::::LLLLLLLLL:::::LII::::::IIK:::::::K   K::::::KEE::::::EEEEEEEE:::::E
L::::::::::::::::::::::LI::::::::IK:::::::K    K:::::KE::::::::::::::::::::E
L::::::::::::::::::::::LI::::::::IK:::::::K    K:::::KE::::::::::::::::::::E
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TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHH     HHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIII   SSSSSSSSSSSSSSS 
T:::::::::::::::::::::TH:::::::H     H:::::::HI::::::::I SS:::::::::::::::S
T:::::::::::::::::::::TH:::::::H     H:::::::HI::::::::IS:::::SSSSSS::::::S
T:::::TT:::::::TT:::::THH::::::H     H::::::HHII::::::IIS:::::S     SSSSSSS
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        T:::::T          H:::::H     H:::::H    I::::I  S:::::S            
        T:::::T          H::::::HHHHH::::::H    I::::I   S::::SSSS         
        T:::::T          H:::::::::::::::::H    I::::I    SS::::::SSSSS    
        T:::::T          H:::::::::::::::::H    I::::I      SSS::::::::SS  
        T:::::T          H::::::HHHHH::::::H    I::::I         SSSSSS::::S 
        T:::::T          H:::::H     H:::::H    I::::I              S:::::S
        T:::::T          H:::::H     H:::::H    I::::I              S:::::S
      TT:::::::TT      HH::::::H     H::::::HHII::::::IISSSSSSS     S:::::S
      T:::::::::T      H:::::::H     H:::::::HI::::::::IS::::::SSSSSS:::::S
      T:::::::::T      H:::::::H     H:::::::HI::::::::IS:::::::::::::::SS 
      TTTTTTTTTTT      HHHHHHHHH     HHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIII SSSSSSSSSSSSSSS   




:::::::::: :::    ::: ::::::::::: :::    ::: :::::::::  :::    ::: ::::::::::: 
:+:        :+:    :+:     :+:     :+:    :+: :+:    :+: :+:   :+:      :+:     
+:+        +:+    +:+     +:+     +:+    +:+ +:+    +:+ +:+  +:+       +:+     
:#::+::#   +#+    +:+     +#+     +#+    +:+ +#++:++#:  +#++:++        +#+     
+#+        +#+    +#+     +#+     +#+    +#+ +#+    +#+ +#+  +#+       +#+     
#+#        #+#    #+#     #+#     #+#    #+# #+#    #+# #+#   #+#      #+#     
###         ########      ###      ########  ###    ### ###    ### ########### 
::::    :::  ::::::::  
:+:+:   :+: :+:    :+: 
:+:+:+  +:+ +:+        
+#+ +:+ +#+ :#:        
+#+  +#+#+# +#+   +#+# 
#+#   #+#+# #+#    #+# 
###    ####  ########  




#######                                                   
#       #    # ##### #    # #####  #    # # #    #  ####  
#       #    #   #   #    # #    # #   #  # ##   # #    # 
#####   #    #   #   #    # #    # ####   # # #  # #      
#       #    #   #   #    # #####  #  #   # #  # # #  ### 
#       #    #   #   #    # #   #  #   #  # #   ## #    # 
#        ####    #    ####  #    # #    # # #    #  ####  






8888888888       888                     888      d8b                   
888              888                     888      Y8P                   
888              888                     888                            
8888888 888  888 888888 888  888 888d888 888  888 888 88888b.   .d88b.  
888     888  888 888    888  888 888P"   888 .88P 888 888 "88b d88P"88b 
888     888  888 888    888  888 888     888888K  888 888  888 888  888 
888     Y88b 888 Y88b.  Y88b 888 888     888 "88b 888 888  888 Y88b 888 
888      "Y88888  "Y888  "Y88888 888     888  888 888 888  888  "Y88888 
                                                                    888 
                                                               Y8b d88P                                                                 

                                                            

Cours de langue de bois

Commencez par la case en haut à gauche, puis enchaînez avec n’importe quelle case en colonne 2, puis avec n’importe laquelle en 3, puis n’importe laquelle en 4 et revenez ensuite où bon vous semble en colonne 1 pour enchaîner au hasard…

Mais surtout, 

n’oubliez pas d’y mettre l’intonation et la force de conviction…

Lao Tzu quotes

The five colours blind the eye.
The five tones deafen the ear.
The five flavours dull the taste.
Racing and hunting madden the mind.
Precious things lead one astray.

When you are content to be simply yourself and don't compare or compete, everybody will respect you.


When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.


A good traveler has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving.

A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves.


Respond intelligently even to unintelligent treatment.


Music in the soul can be heard by the universe.


How could man rejoice in victory and delight in the slaughter of men?


Ido not concern myself with gods and spirits either good or evil nor do I serve any.


Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart and the senses.


If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.


Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.


Born to be wild - live to outgrow it.


Be Content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.


The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.


He who knows, does not speak. He who speaks, does not know.


In dwelling, live close to the ground. In thinking, keep to the simple. In conflict, be fair and generous. In governing, don't try to control. In work, do what you enjoy. In family life, be completely present.


If you realize that all things change, there is nothing you will try to hold on to. If you are not afraid of dying, there is nothing you cannot achieve.


Man's enemies are not demons, but human beings like himself.


Knowing others is wisdom, knowing yourself is Enlightenment.


To realize that you do not understand is a virtue; Not to realize that you do not understand is a defect.


An ant on the move does more than a dozing ox.


Nothing is softer or more flexible than water, yet nothing can resist it.


I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures.


Silence is a source of great strength.

Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.


He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still.


At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.


Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach him how to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.


Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love.


To lead people walk behind them.


He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.


One who is too insistent on his own views, finds few to agree with him.


The more laws and order are made prominent, the more thieves and robbers there will be.


Because of a great love, one is courageous.


Do the difficult things while they are easy and do the great things while they are small. A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.


Fill your bowl to the brim and it will spill. Keep sharpening your knife and it will blunt.


Truthful words are not beautiful; beautiful words are not truthful. Good words are not persuasive; persuasive words are not good.


Be the chief but never the lord.

Manifest plainness, embrace simplicity, reduce selfishness, have few desires.


When the best leader's work is done the people say, "We did it ourselves."


The people are hungry: It is because those in authority eat up too much in taxes.


All difficult things have their origin in that which is easy, and great things in that which is small.


By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond the winning.


He who is contented is rich.


The power of intuitive understanding will protect you from harm until the end of your days.


To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders.


Anticipate the difficult by managing the easy.


Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.


To see things in the seed, that is genius.


Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish. Do not overdo it.


He who talks more is sooner exhausted.


Life and death are one thread, the same line viewed from different sides.


Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them - that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.


One can not reflect in streaming water. Only those who know internal peace can give it to others.


Those who have knowledge, don't predict. Those who predict, don't have knowledge.


To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage.


From caring comes courage.


The sage does not hoard. Having bestowed all he has on others, he has yet more; having given all he has to others, he is richer still.


The softest things in the world overcome the hardest things in the world.


The words of truth are always paradoxical.


He who does not trust enough, Will not be trusted.


He who obtains has little. He who scatters has much.


If you would take, you must first give, this is the beginning of intelligence.


Mastering others is strength. Mastering yourself is true power.


Nature is not human hearted.


The career of a sage is of two kinds: He is either honored by all in the world, Like a flower waving its head, Or else he disappears into the silent forest.


The wicked leader is he who the people despise. The good leader is he who the people revere. The great leader is he who the people say, 'We did it ourselves.'


The wise man does not lay up his own treasures. The more he gives to others, the more he has for his own.


Violence, even well intentioned, always rebounds upon oneself.


Great acts are made up of small deeds.


Great indeed is the sublimity of the Creative, to which all beings owe their beginning and which permeates all heaven.


He who conquers others is strong; He who conquers himself is mighty.

He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened.


If the Great Way perishes there will morality and duty. When cleverness and knowledge arise great lies will flourish. When relatives fall out with one another there will be filial duty and love. When states are in confusion there will be faithful servants.


In the world there is nothing more submissive and weak than water. Yet for attacking that which is hard and strong nothing can surpass it.


It is better to do one's own duty, however defective it may be, than to follow the duty of another, however well one may perform it. He who does his duty as his own nature reveals it, never sins.


Of all that is good, sublimity is supreme. Succeeding is the coming together of all that is beautiful. Furtherance is the agreement of all that is just. Perseverance is the foundation of all actions.


People in their handlings of affairs often fail when they are about to succeed. If one remains as careful at the end as he was at the beginning, there will be no failure.


Simulated disorder postulates perfect discipline; simulated fear postulates courage; simulated weakness postulates strength.


The higher the sun ariseth, the less shadow doth he cast; even so the greater is the goodness, the less doth it covet praise; yet cannot avoid its rewards in honours.


The key to growth is the introduction of higher dimensions of consciousness into our awareness.


The sage does not hoard. The more he helps others, the more he benefits himself, The more he gives to others, the more he gets himself. The Way of Heaven does one good but never does one harm. The Way of the sage is to act but not to compete.


To know yet to think that one does not know is best; Not to know yet to think that one knows will lead to difficulty.


Treat those who are good with goodness, and also treat those who are not good with goodness. Thus goodness is attained. Be honest to those who are honest, and be also honest to those who are not honest. Thus honesty is attained.


When a nation is filled with strife, then do patriots flourish.


Without stirring abroad, One can know the whole world; Without looking out of the window One can see the way of heaven. The further one goes The less one knows.


A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.


Ambition has one heel nailed in well, though she stretch her fingers to touch the heavens.


Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength; loving someone deeply gives you courage.


From wonder into wonder existence opens.


Governing a great nation is like cooking a small fish - too much handling will spoil it.


He who knows himself is enlightened.


He who knows others is clever; He who knows himself has discernment.


Health is the greatest possession. Contentment is the greatest treasure. Confidence is the greatest friend. Non-being is the greatest joy.

老子

Très romantique tout cela!

Une amie m'a partagée ceci. 

Prenez votre temps à lire, vous serez surpris!

Poème de George Sand à Alfred de Musset

Cher ami,

Je suis toute émue de vous dire que j'ai
bien compris l'autre jour que vous aviez
toujours une envie folle de me faire
danser. Je garde le souvenir de votre
baiser et je voudrais bien que ce soit
une preuve que je puisse être aimée
par vous. Je suis prête à montrer mon
affection toute desinteressée et sans cal-
cul, et si vous voulez me voir ainsi
vous dévoiler, sans artifice, mon âme
toute nue, daignez me faire visite,
nous causerons et en amis franchement
je vous prouverai que je suis la femme
sincère, capable de vous offrir l'affection
la plus profonde, comme la plus étroite
amitié, en un mot : la meilleure épouse
dont vous puissiez rêver. Puisque votre
âme est libre, pensez que l'abandon ou je
vis est bien long, bien dur et souvent bien
insupportable. Mon chagrin est trop
gros. Accourrez bien vite et venez me le
faire oublier. A vous je veux me sou-
mettre entièrement.

Votre poupée

Maintenant, relisez la lettre ci-dessus une ligne sur deux...

 Voici la réponse d'Alfred De Musset:

Quand je mets a vos pieds un éternel hommage,
Voulez-vous qu'un instant je change de visage ?
Vous avez capturé les sentiments d'un coeur
Que pour vous adorer forma le créateur.
Je vous chéris, amour, et ma plume en délire
Couche sur le papier ce que je n'ose dire.
Avec soin de mes vers lisez les premiers mots,
Vous saurez quel remède apporter à mes maux.

Alfred de Musset 
(il fallait lire tout ça au premier mot de chaque ligne)

La réponse de Georges est une merveille de concision:

Cette insigne faveur que votre coeur réclame
Nuit à ma renommée et répugne à mon âme.

George Sand